Today my twin brother (or “twother”) turns 24. Happy birthday, twin!

As soon as people find out that we are twins, they always ask some of the stupidest questions. I'm going to try and list a few here for some laughs.

Are you identical?
Um, no. We have different genitals and I mos def had my own embryonic sac. But I’ve grown so tired of correcting people on this that I just always tell them “yes.” I think they just mean “do we look alike.” When they ask if we are “maternal” or “paternal” I think that means “fraternal” so I also concede to this. I can’t assume the responsibility of constantly educating people on the biology of twins – but I also don’t want the accountability associated with perpetuating “misinformation.” Well, you can’t have it all.

Are you born on the same day?
Yes we are born on the same day. Yes, that does mean we have the same birthday. Yes, that means we both are the exact same age.

Who is older?
Why does this matter so much? It's just a few minutes apart. But I'm older. Heh!

Do you wish your brother was a sister instead (apparently, “twice the clothes” is the selling point)
Not a chance. I’m not writing that because it’s his birthday OR because I also have a sister. None of them even read my journals. The problem with being a twin is that it implicitly sentences you to constant comparison. And comparison only invites disparity. If he were female, it would be all, “who’s hotter?” and “who’s smarter?” Somehow, being different genders has helped us dodge that bullet and we’re characterized more as “brother and sister” than twins. Holler!

Do you know what he’s thinking “right now”or feel pain if he's in pain
No, that’s just ridiculous. I once got asked if I had the same dreams as he did. WTF!?

So which one of you is the evil twin?
I have no idea what people are looking for asking this question. I usually chuckle and say: "That'd be me."

Why don't you have similar names?
Gosh! I don't know? My parents didn't want them to be "similar"? I'm actually glad they didn't.

Do you dress alike!?
I have noticed that some people expect twins, identical or not to be dressed the same for some godforsaken reason. Let's just say I don't want my brother to sport a skirt (not to be mistaken by a kilt) or a fairly girly top. XD

Do twins run in the family?
Only fraternal (dizygotic twins) are influenced by heredity. So that'd be a yes. C:

What is like it to be a twin?
I’m genuinely sorry that you’re not a twin. It certainly has its pros and cons. Being a twin is a constant exercise in compromise and negotiation. There are a lot of trade offs, at least early on, and it’s hard to be the “first” to do anything since so much is concurrent. But I like to think that being a twin has helped me empathize, listen, and generally get along with others. It’s certainly endowed me with a brave-ness – I always had a buddy on the first day of school, etc. who had my back – not to mention a constant co-raconteur – and forced my consistent curiousity. My twinship also taught me how to get when I want when/if possible and made me a little bit bossy. Guess what? I’m not complaining.

So, chances are that you’re reading this and you grew in your mother’s womb solo. But that doesn’t mean that a twin-ship, albeit at the pseudo-level, is out of reach for you. All it takes is a bit of: unconditional love, understanding, forgiveness, support, encouragement, and rock-steady friendship. Easy, right?

Be somebody’s twin. (Twice the clothes!) (Just kidding).


While in dAmn yesterday. *xblackwater surprised me with a 3 month premium subscription. Even though I'm not that active on dA anymore I am grateful for his kind gesture. Mashkoora.